STEVEN SPILLS © 77
THE GAY LIST
While attending the traditional Sunday Beer Bust, err, “Beverage Social” at a local watering hole last Sunday, a shameless floor show unexpectedly begun. It was still daylight, but the sun had disappeared behind the San Jacinto Mountains and dim lighting was nowhere to be found just yet. However, as the husband and I stood chatting with friends outside near the front entrance, the scene around us became quite explicit. Shockingly real, in fact. I mention “watering hole” because naming said establishment could really cause waves, but you do the math. No, not the Tool Shed.
While enjoying a hot-from-the-grill sauced-up wiener inside my bun, I glanced over to my right and almost dropped the hot dog in disgust. There they were, Handy Jayze and Blowah Jobzee working it out next to us. Such a class act, those two! And in public! I mean wait until it’s fucking dark, you freaks! And right where they were serving food! But that was incomparable to the one who decided that even though there wasn’t a line for the bathroom, he’d whip out his hose and empty his liquid courage onto the concrete between his friend’s feet, who stood and acted as if it was the grandest thing. Just giddy, they all were. “Wee! Watch him pee!” I almost lost my lunch. Don’t be mad at me. I’m only reporting what I saw.
I’m excited to report that I’ve been tapped to judge the Mr. Tool Shed Leather contest on October 13th. The competition starts at 9 p.m. with the winner heading to Mr. Palm Springs Leather and then hopefully to the finals of International Mr. Leather in Chicago next Memorial Day Weekend. If you get a chance stop in, have a beer and support the contestants. And don’t forget to say, “Hello.” I’ll have the details of my place on the judge’s panel and what happened behind the scenes at this prestigious preliminary in my next column!
While on the subject, this past week the Miss Gay USofA at Large pageant commenced in Tampa, Florida. This competition focuses on queens that weigh over 200 lbs. (yes they’re weighed) or over 6’ tall, and qualify from preliminary contests. There were 34 large and lovely talented entertainers vying for the coveted crown. Our very own showgirl Delorian Chase, who represented as Miss Gay Arizona USofA at Large, placed in the Top 12, even winning Best Solo Talent! The Lady Tahjee Iman was announced as the winner with Angelica Sanchez placing 1st alternate and Mercedes rounding out the top spots.
When you think of these competitive queens, it would be a mistake not to segue into another set of queens who believe they too rule the school. If you have Logo TV and want to watch a desperate scene of proving one’s fierceitude (new word, learn it) then please check out The A-List: New York. Damn, where to begin. First and foremost, the show is an hour-long hot mess of a thing and even the sweeping pans of Manhattan can’t save this retched endorsement that extremists are often rewarded and an ounce of pretension is worth its weight in gold on this reality wreck. Maybe I should contain myself. HA! The show revolves around a small group of self-proclaimed privileged gay men who live on the concrete jungle where dreams are made of (thank you Alicia Keys) and they feel there’s nothing they can’t do in New York. Cattiness and vapid encounters ensue.
THE GAY LIST
While attending the traditional Sunday Beer Bust, err, “Beverage Social” at a local watering hole last Sunday, a shameless floor show unexpectedly begun. It was still daylight, but the sun had disappeared behind the San Jacinto Mountains and dim lighting was nowhere to be found just yet. However, as the husband and I stood chatting with friends outside near the front entrance, the scene around us became quite explicit. Shockingly real, in fact. I mention “watering hole” because naming said establishment could really cause waves, but you do the math. No, not the Tool Shed.
While enjoying a hot-from-the-grill sauced-up wiener inside my bun, I glanced over to my right and almost dropped the hot dog in disgust. There they were, Handy Jayze and Blowah Jobzee working it out next to us. Such a class act, those two! And in public! I mean wait until it’s fucking dark, you freaks! And right where they were serving food! But that was incomparable to the one who decided that even though there wasn’t a line for the bathroom, he’d whip out his hose and empty his liquid courage onto the concrete between his friend’s feet, who stood and acted as if it was the grandest thing. Just giddy, they all were. “Wee! Watch him pee!” I almost lost my lunch. Don’t be mad at me. I’m only reporting what I saw.
I’m excited to report that I’ve been tapped to judge the Mr. Tool Shed Leather contest on October 13th. The competition starts at 9 p.m. with the winner heading to Mr. Palm Springs Leather and then hopefully to the finals of International Mr. Leather in Chicago next Memorial Day Weekend. If you get a chance stop in, have a beer and support the contestants. And don’t forget to say, “Hello.” I’ll have the details of my place on the judge’s panel and what happened behind the scenes at this prestigious preliminary in my next column!
While on the subject, this past week the Miss Gay USofA at Large pageant commenced in Tampa, Florida. This competition focuses on queens that weigh over 200 lbs. (yes they’re weighed) or over 6’ tall, and qualify from preliminary contests. There were 34 large and lovely talented entertainers vying for the coveted crown. Our very own showgirl Delorian Chase, who represented as Miss Gay Arizona USofA at Large, placed in the Top 12, even winning Best Solo Talent! The Lady Tahjee Iman was announced as the winner with Angelica Sanchez placing 1st alternate and Mercedes rounding out the top spots.
When you think of these competitive queens, it would be a mistake not to segue into another set of queens who believe they too rule the school. If you have Logo TV and want to watch a desperate scene of proving one’s fierceitude (new word, learn it) then please check out The A-List: New York. Damn, where to begin. First and foremost, the show is an hour-long hot mess of a thing and even the sweeping pans of Manhattan can’t save this retched endorsement that extremists are often rewarded and an ounce of pretension is worth its weight in gold on this reality wreck. Maybe I should contain myself. HA! The show revolves around a small group of self-proclaimed privileged gay men who live on the concrete jungle where dreams are made of (thank you Alicia Keys) and they feel there’s nothing they can’t do in New York. Cattiness and vapid encounters ensue.
Without spilling my nut over it, I’ll say with the exclusion of celeb-photographer extraordinaire Mike Ruiz, the others are out to prove their worthiness to our gay society. Mike is by far the one who would be on anyone’s true A-List. And who comes up with these lists, anyway?! In my own words, the producers are solidifying stubborn stereotypes because that’s what sells on television. Normalcy does not. Granted I’ve only seen one episode at press time but that was enough. I quickly got the point. Oh, girls.
And a serious thought for the road. I’m not sure who exactly my columns touch or where the words end up, but if this has found you during darker days, you’re not alone. This is directed at all of my readers, but I’m reflecting on the current string of suicides stemming from bullying and hate among our younger generations. I only hope complacency doesn’t reign over reaction with an insisted belief of, “It gets better,” and people sit around waiting for it to get better instead of changing it. Times get hard, money gets tight, hate breeds, people become pressured to be something, desperation sets in. Hell, life has its ups and downs but over time I’ve learned to process, progress, and when I can, recess. Love yourselves. More to come…
0 Comments:
Post a Comment